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Hospinbecame engaged in conversation. I cringed when he told her what awonderful and industrious daughter she had. I guess I wasn't too good ataccepting praise, wherever it came from.We made our way home and I put the paint away in the hall closet. I spenta few hours on the internet; reading and replying to emails and doing abit more research on my "condition". Some of the sad stories Iencountered made me wonder if I'd ever find true happiness. Why didanyone care what gender I was? It was nobody's business but my own. Well,and of course my family's. I smiled as I considered that Sam was a veryimportant member of my family. Perhaps, the most important of all. I went downstairs to say goodnight to Mom. She was working in her sewingroom. For some reason the door was closed. I knocked before enteringremembering the scene with Darla and Sarah. "Just a minute Joan!" Mom'svoice rang out. What was she doing in there? Was she hiding somethingfrom me? I quickly put such thoughts away when she. It was very slow, but to me, it was everything. The next day, they installed the internet with the filter on it, meaning I could not find any "harmful" websites. Luckily, Matthew knew exactly how to bypass a filter like that, and he helped me work past that problem. Now the world was open to me, and I could finally build my intellect from scratch.Withing months, I was well versed in all the scientific theories by the great minds of Einstein, Hawkins, Darwin and the like. I also managed to get into video games, movies, good music and the wonderful world of comic books. Of course, and this goes without saying, I could never tell a soul about this but Matthew. If I told anyone else at my high-school - which was very strict protestant institution as well - word might travel back to my parents, and my laptop would be confiscated.But, as it turned out, I could not keep it a secret to everyone. One night, after I came home from Matthew's place, I found one of my two siblings sitting at my.
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